There are so many ways of letting go. We let go of things… ideas… dreams…people….sometimes all of those at once. To me, letting go, mostly has a negative connotation, but, truly, it is often good. Letting go can be a sign of growth and better things.
Tomorrow, my oldest child is moving away to start a new career, his first and I am, again, in the position of letting go.
“A mother who is really a mother is never free.”~Honore De Balzac
I remember his first day of daycare…..his first day of pre-school, kindergarten, first lost tooth, etc, etc. I remember, way, way back, to day one, when they whisked him away so fast, I barely got to see him. Even then, on his first day of life, I had to learn the bittersweet lesson of letting go.
Other than those first few precarious years, most of the letting go has been for good reasons, natural life events.
Five years ago, when I helped move him into his first dorm room, I was thrilled, excited and proud (and a little sad!)! Four short, very short years later, I was even more excited, thrilled and proud as I watched him march to pick up his degree!
When he came home again, the shift began. While many of the roles were still the same, he had become an adult. We were able to be “friends”. He introduced me to TV shows and movies that I never would have watched on my own. He explained politics and electronics, and became my hiking buddy and midnight snacker as he searched (and searched) for a job.
Last May, he took on a new role, as uncle to Jace. I’m not sure that any of us knew how much love existed before this little man joined our lives.
Instead of letting go, it seemed our lives were getting fuller and fuller, including the addition of two more fur babies. We were back to our original unit of three plus one amazing addition. Not only did I NOT think about letting go, I actually began to be complacent. Why not? I had a full house.
And then it happened! He found a job. And not just any job, but a job that will help him to launch his career. A job that is only the beginning of this next exciting phase in his life….the real world, where he truly can begin his life…as an individual. An individual in a new career, new city, new friends and responsibilities. A new life! He is embarking on a an amazing journey and right now, it is all about him. My role will shift, again. I will be letting go, in the most bittersweet of ways, because I have to. And…I couldn’t be prouder, more thrilled or excited than I am for him today!
“There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give our children. One of these is roots, the other, is wings.”
~Johaan Wolfgang Von Goethe
So, yes, it is with all my heart, and much courage, that I am….